I have a crazy headache right now. *WhineWhineblahWhine.*

At least today was pretty dang productive. Of course, there is never enough time in the day to do everything you intended to do. I mean, I get 5 books for my birthday and you expect me to actually WORK?! I believe that truly falls under the 8th amendment in the US Constitution: “No cruel and unusual punishment.” You lock an English teacher in a room with some great classics, new and old, and then tell them to scrub the walls. WITH A TOOTHBRUSH. What do you really think is going to happen?

(Note: this is a partially true story. I wasn’t an English teacher -obviously- when I was growing up, but my parents would take away my books as punishment or if they wanted to make me do something I didn’t want to do. Cruel. I KNOW.) Love ya, Mom and Dad.

But I digress. Despite the obvious distraction, I was surprisingly productive today. Slept in (yay!), got up, had a gourmet breakfast of off-brand cereal, and then Jared and I did a whole crapton of work. In no particular order: went to the apartment, cleaned, got some more stuff that I have to put away at the house. Went to the bank. Did grocery shopping. Vacuumed. Price-checked products at Lowe’s and Home Depot.

Well, Jared price checked. By the time we made it to Home of Pot (if you know latin languages, you’ll get it) I was not feeling so well and decided to distract myself at the flower section. I was able to identify several of the plants in our backyard. So far, I found Texas Sage, Autumn Sage, Mexican Heather, lantana, crape myrtle, and purple fountain grass. Oh yeah. I was busy at the Home Depot. I also know we have some lilies and a rose of sharon tree, but really, I knew that before. And as you read that your eyes probably started to close and you were threatening close to nodding off, but hey, PLANTS ARE EXPENSIVE! It’s good to know what you have so you don’t kill it off, and then you have to replace it or look at dead ugly plants in a dead, ugly yard.

When we got home, we decided to have a delicious dinner of Costco cake and ice cream. OH YES WE DID! I still can’t beleive Jared was okay with that, but I’m not complaining.

Then to work off all those fatty calories, we did a lot of yardwork. To give you an idea of the comfort level, we were doing yard work at 7:00 PM in the evening. It’s now 11:00 PM and it’s STILL 88 degrees.  I took comfort by trimming bushes back and wagging war with the many, many mini trees in the area that we call “The Forest.”

Here’s the infamous Bee Tree. This picture doesn’t even begin to show the immensity of The Forest, but when you are in the middle of it, it can be kinda overwhelming. It did surprise me how much I enjoyed cutting down all the sprouts. I think it would have been even better if I hadn’t been covered in sweat from having to wear jeans and a long sleeved shirt to protect myself from the bugs. Bugs are attracted to me as if I covered myself in chocolate and asked little kids to lick me. And then when they bite me, I am left with several days discomfort from bites that swell up to the size of a discolored, mottley orange.

And still, Jared loves me. Am I a lucky woman or what?

Hence the eau de “OFF!” and battle armour to protect Jared’s sanity. I am still awed by how I found it mysteriously satisfying physical labor for the hour I did it. And still, the majority of the forest is still there. And will need to be removed, because it’s a bug breeding ground.

So. I guess you could say I am just working on destroying nature, one tree sprout at a time.